Dualies (a.k.a. Capricorn, December 22 – January 20): This should be a pretty dang good month, all around for y'all.  There's some nice friendly planets in your sign that should bring good luck your way in one form or another.  It really don't get much better 'n that, or you can butter my buns and call me a biscuit.  The only thing that may not be movin' along too good would be if you have any legal stuff goin' on or you're planning a trip to the other side of the state, cuz there will probably be delays.  Things at work may feel as if they're stuck in the mud, which they probably are until late spring.  If you overindulged in anything over the holidays you may be paying a bit of a price in that your jeans may be a bit tight.  You may not have much ambition to do anything other than go to Walmart and get a new pair, but you know that's not what you oughta do 'bout it.

Lonestars (a.k.a. Aquarius, January 21 – February 18):  Your lovelife, if you have one, might be a little dicey this month.  Your significant other may be a little grumpy and if you two have any axes you're grinding, fixin' your own lunch might be a good idea, if you don't already.  You both might be just pain gettin' on each others nerves and need a vacation.  Separate ones, to opposite ends of the state.  Gettin' laid is definitely not lookin' good.  On the other hand, things look good financially so it might not hurt to buy a lotto ticket or two.

Hurricanes (a.k.a. Pisces, February 19 – March 20): People at home are likely to be acting ornery and doin' stuff like throwin' out your favorite magazine that you always leave next to the john in the reading room.  Your significant other is probably walking around like a dog with a burr in his foot and you know somethin's up, just don't quite know what.  On the positive side, you're likely to be popular down at the ice house these days, or at the shootin' range, or just about anywhere but home.  If being gone will make it worse, get yourself a case of your favorite brew and try to fade into the woodwork as much as possible.

Longhorns (a.k.a. Aries, March 21 – April 20): If you have any neighbors that you don't get on with very well, chances are they'll do something that will piss you off in one way or another this month.  Things at work are probably stuck in reverse, too.  All is not lost, however, at least not enough to hole up in your fishin' cabin with a case of Jim Beam until the storm passes.  Things are lookin' rather good as far as your career ambitions are concerned and everyone else is likely to think your crap don't stink.  Put your energy where it will do the most good.

Tony Lamas (a.k.a. Taurus, April 21 – May 21):  It's not lookin' especially good in the money department these days, which I know is one of your favorite areas.  Stuff is likely to break down, and if you can't fix it yourself, finding a repairman is likely to be about as fun as a romp through poison ivy.  Your kids may be costing you a bunch right now, either in dollars or some other commodity, and the same goes for your lovelife.  On the positive side, things look good for a trip to the other side of the state, buying some new property, or even going back to school.

Dust Devils (a.k.a. Gemini, May 22 – June 21):  People may think you're starting a fight even when you're not this month cuz you're just gonna have that look aboutcha, if y'all know what I mean.  If you're trying to get anything done around the ol' homestead, expect delays until after the bluebonnets bloom.  If it can wait, you'd do best to just move on to somethin' else for a while.  Somethin' to look at doin' that could do you some good might be to find someone to go in with you on that brainstorm you've been tossin' around in your head for a while now.  In that particular area your subtle aggression will be perceived as being a go-getter, which will work in your favor.

Verandas (a.k.a. Cancer, June 22 – July 22):  You're probably goin' to be in a pretty gloomy frame o' mind for a while, probably until after the bluebonnets bloom.  If you're trying to get somethin' done with a neighbor, like put in a new fence or somethin' like that, expect delays.  Your time would be well-spent concentrating on the people closest to you.  Your significant other, close friends, relatives you actually like, or anyone at work you get along with will all be rather sympathetic and make you feel a little better about all the other crap going on.  It's really not as bad as it seems.

Tycoons (a.k.a. Leo, July 23 – August 23):  I can just bet that your money ain't there or seems to disappear, your bank balance shrinking like all your clothes did after the holidays.  I know y'all don't wanna here this, bu this is goin' to be happening for a while.  It will do you good in the long run, however, if you take a good hard look at how you manage your bucks and figure out how much of it is bad luck or just you.  Those daily jaunts to Starbucks in the mornin' and the ice house after work add up a bunch.  On the positive side, things at work are looking good with a new job or project likely, maybe even a promotion or a raise.  You'd do well to spend time this month with those that matter, not just a bunch of people that really couldn't give a flip whether you ever cross the threshold again.

Cowpokes (a.k.a. Virgo, August 24 – September 22):  More 'n likely you feel like you're stuck in the mud after a spring rain lately.  Every time you try 'n get anything done or move forward, you hit a frikkin' wall of some kind, right?  That may not get much better for a while, like until after the bluebonnets bloom, but there is some good stuff out there.  Now is a good time to think about what you wanna do to make a livin' for the rest of your life.  It's also a good time to be creative, spend time with your kids, or do a little romancing, either with someone new or to spruce things up with someone you've been dating for a while.

Tumbleweeds (a.k.a. Libra, September 23 – October 23): Things should be goin' good at home these days with it a great time to start a new project of some sort.  You'll enjoy being there and get a lot of satisfaction over gettin' stuff done.  More than likely those around you will be pretty happy 'bout it, too.  On the down side, if you have any legal stuff in work, such as trying to sell property, or are maybe trying to plan a long trip or get the kids ready for college, you're likely to encounter a bunch of ornery, uncooperative folks.  You're probably not too inspired these days generally, so get out the ol' toolbox and do something you know how until it passes.

Oil Wells (a.k.a. Scorpio, October 24 – November 22):  The good news for y'all is that you're likely to have a bunch of really good ideas which are likely to come out quite well these days.  You may even come up with one particular brainstorm that will be a real winner.  By the end of the month, things should start goin' better as far as stuff breaking down or other problems like stuck plumbing and other delights.  It's not a good idea to loan out any money these days, which you probably don't do anyway.  Be careful drivin' or doin' anything else that's dangerous, too.

Stetsons (a.k.a. Sagittarius, November 23 – December 21):  This month sucks for some folks and their finances, but yours should be lookin' rather good.  You might even get a raise or a promotion or win an award or somethin'.  Your relationships, however, may not be so great, particularly with a significant other or close friend or relative.  If there's an ax to grind it's likely to be grindin' away, but not in an in-you-face manner.  Rather you'll probably just notice that the people closest to you seem grumpy and not too inclined to do you any favors.