[Click on your Sign for an expanded version of this month's horoscope.]

ALERT, ALL SIGNS:  OK, it ain't over yet, so continue to pay attention.  Between May 26 - June 19 electronic and mechanical devices are going to be more prone than usual to go on the fritz, so plan accordingly. Don't expect anything to work correctly or the first time.  Be especially diligent regarding maintenance issues to avoid exacerbating the situation.  Orders and all other communications are also more likely to be FUBAR'd, so make sure you're absolutely clear on what you're trying to say or what you think you heard. 

F-16 Fighting Falcons (a.k.a. Gemini, May 22 – June 21):  You'll probably be the center of attention this month, but like they say, don't call attention to yourself, it draws fire. However, if you're on a mental roll, it's hard to keep quiet, especially when you know what you're talking about.  More arguments than usual are out there as a result, so just make sure you know what the hell you're talking about or someone will take considerable pleasure rubbing your nose in it.  Changes in your view of things may be exactly right, but if they conflict with your CO it cause problems.  Just know when to cut your losses and STFU.

Foxholes (a.k.a. Cancer, June 22 – July 22):  The chances of someone else messing something up that belongs to you are increased this month, so think long and hard before loaning out anything unless you don't mind it coming back in a far different condition than it went out. Spend some time with people you like this month and talk about something other than sex or weapons.  New ideas will have a good effect on your existing beliefs, but you need to keep an open mind, especially about relationships.  Being more spaced out than usual could bring some interesting insights, but don't let daydreaming distract you when you need to maintain situational awareness.

Carbines (a.k.a. Leo, July 23 – August 23):  Expect a lot of interaction with your unit this month, giving you an opportunity to impress them with your leadership ability.  Don't let your ego get too inflated, though, or someone will probably rub your nose in it.  If you haven't been as diligent as you should maintaining your gear, especially your weapon, something will probably get you to rethink that this month.  Discipline in maintaining important hardware can save your ass, so if you haven't already figured that out, you probably will.  Changing how you see various things will slap you upside the head this month, but the lessons will serve you well later so pay attention.

Drill Sergeants (a.k.a. Virgo, August 24 – September 22):  Put your natural eye for detail and meticulous (a.k.a. anal) methods to work this month in such a way that others can see and it will build you a good reputation, even if they still think you're anal.  They'll see that it pays off, no matter what they say aloud, and know that even if they think you're an asshole, you're the one they'll want watching their six.  Your CO will already know you're worth your weight in ammo, but it never hurts to remind him or her.  Being more careful than everyone else, significantly more mechanically inclined, and following orders to the last detail will ultimately be rewarded.  If it gets you promoted, who cares what they think?

Tracers (a.k.a. Libra, September 23 – October 23):  There will be a lot of action going on relative to foreign cultures this month.  If you're deployed, you'll be learning a lot and if you're not, you probably are getting ready to be.  If you come up with some good ideas, you'll have more discipline than usual to dig up the information you need to put them into action.  Using skills you learned back home to fulfill your assignment will payoff well, even though you're likely to get some opposition from people who don't think it will work.  Stick to your guns, those assholes don't know what they're talking about and you do.

Submarines (a.k.a. Scorpio, October 24 – November 22):  This month you'll be even more prone than usual to see things at a deeper level than the assholes around you.  Working with your unit should be rewarding as you catch things they miss.  You'll also impress them with your discipline when it comes to operating as a unit.  The insights you gain will make a lasting impression on you more so than anyone else, probably because there's a lot of things they just don't "get" and you do.  Pay close attention to your gear, particularly your weapons, and follow your instincts if you think they need maintenance. 

Howitzers (a.k.a. Sagittarius, November 23 – December 21):  This month you'll see a lot of interaction with others in your unit.  A promotion could be on the way as well.  Pay extra close attention to maintaining everything you're in charge of and follow your instincts if you think something isn't right.  It looks like a good time for a surprise package from home, so keep an eye out.  Don't be a smart-ass this month or let your guard down as you may be somewhat accident prone.  Opposition to an inspired idea regarding the locals is likely.  Make damn sure it's realistic before falling on your sword for it.

M16s (a.k.a. Capricorn, December 22 – January 20):  This month you're going to see a lot of activity in your assignment, whatever it happens to be.  Something new will come along and it'll have you busier than hell, but you'll surprise even yourself with how well you keep up, thanks to an influx of innovative ideas.  Stuff around you will have a deep and lasting effect that will change your view of the world in some way.  This is not a bad thing, but what moving forward with your life is all about.

Buddies (a.k.a. Aquarius, January 21 – February 18):  You may trip over your ego a few times this month if you aren't careful.  It looks like a good time for a poker game or two, but make sure you're not an obnoxious winner, if you don't want your butt kicked.  You may come up with a new way to do something, but everyone else thinks you've been out in the heat too long.  Be prepared to prove you're in touch with reality.  If it's an option and something you've been thinking about, it's a good time to put in for a transfer.

Torpedoes (a.k.a. Pisces, February 19 – March 20): Thoughts of home will be heavy and you may find yourself more homesick than usual.  Getting to know those around you at a more personal level will serve as a good distraction.  Throwing yourself into your work will help some, but your concentration may be subject distraction, so make sure you double-check everything to make sure you didn't screw something up that will bite you or someone else later.  Relationships with your superior officers should be going well, which could help your chances for promotion as long as you don't get whiney or start acting like a martyr.

Grenades (a.k.a. Aries, March 21 – April 20): Mental action and creativity will predominate this month, making you an even bigger smartass than usual, and you can bet your last round that everyone won't agree with your ideas.  Take their lame comments with a grain of salt.  Innovative inspiration could provide opportunities for advancement, which doesn't require a popular vote.  However, watch your six this month within the ranks because more than likely you're going to say something that piss someone off.  The OPFOR isn't the only one who can mess you up. Hard work and attention to detail should hook up nicely with some insights into other cultures that will forever change your way of thinking.

Tanks (a.k.a. Taurus, April 21 – May 21):  Really keep an eye on your stuff this month as that "alert" at the beginning really applies to you in spades. Anything electronic (like radios) or mechanical (like your rifle) are especially vulnerable.  Creative ideas of dealing with the locals should be thought through and used, even if your buddies think you're not wrapped too tight.  This month you'll probably get along better with the locals than you do with them, anyway.